Before me is a black belt that years ago was a white belt standing before me, then a senior brown belt. Exercises in humility do not come cheap. He is now going to tell me all the things that I do wrong, he is going to school me in the ways of Goju, alert to any doubt in my eyes as to his evident superiority.
A bitter tea indeed. But that wasn't the half of it. My knees and elbows buckled during the infamous 10-step push up. My legs became rubbery at the fiftieth count of a mae geri drill. I snuck a peek at myself in the faraway mirror and what a sorry sight my eyes beheld. But paraphrasing an old tune: pain is just another word for nothing left to lose. And of this bitter tea I sipped.
More than relearning katas, I had to relearn spirit. Letting go of who I was once but was no longer and finding who I was now and living with it, through it, around it.
2 comments:
"Relearning spirit" - a very intriguing concept! It takes a great deal of spirit even to re-enter the dojo, yet the spirit to, once more, force oneself through pain barriers presents progressive challenges that never ease.
The bitter tea of watching the former white belt take the line ahead of you is also something to which I can strongly relate. Yet another lesson in spirit...
The Warrior within us has no belt ranking...just the spirit of perserverance and the willingness to drink the bitter tea...knowing sweetness is right around the corner.
I always enjoy your posts...especially as my body matures I can relate.
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